On her first day of kindergarten, my 5-year-old daughter asked me to be first in line to pick her up from school. I assured her I would be. Because I love her. And she asked me to. And I can.

When I started my copywriting business in 2017, I made a very conscious decision that I wanted to work and be present for my kids. Look, my husband and I both have to work hard to provide the kind of life we want for our family, so the working part wasn’t really a choice, but the how was.

Any pickup line parent or caregiver knows there are politics to the pickup line. In my case, I have to leave my office by 2:20 p.m. every day to be in the first round of cars for a 3:10 p.m. dismissal. That means my work, my workouts and my appointments have to fit in a six-hour window.

It’s not easy. I work on nights and weekends when I need to. Sometimes, I wonder what it would be like to have generational wealth (so far, my family has given me work ethic, although I’ve experienced my fair share of privilege), to feel less pressured to build a beautiful family and a financially secure career. Earlier this year, I launched another business to publish creative projects because why be busy with just a few things when you can be busy with several?

But, just the other day when I was driving my kids home from school (from the front of the line, naturally), and they were waxing poetic about riding the school bus, I told them that I rode the school bus to day care until fifth grade. I told them my parents—both of whom worked for the government in Olympia, where I grew up—couldn’t just leave work to pick me up. That’s not how the world worked then. 

I told my kids that from fifth grade through middle school, I rode the bus home and hung out by myself until my parents returned from work. I told them I’d pop myself a bag of popcorn and settle in for The Rosie O’Donnell Show and Oprah—both of which I watched in real-time. With commercials!

“You were ALONE?” my 7-year-old son asked.

“Yes,” I said. “I had my pets and my popcorn.”

And then I reminded them that I love to pick them up. I love to hear the playground gossip, how many times they saw each other at recess and hugged, and about the most interesting thing they learned that day.

There are a lot of mom things I don’t do well. I am impatient. I can be selfish. I don’t take the lead on many dinners. I don’t swap out throw pillows and door wreaths for various holidays. I’ve coordinated maybe two playdates. 

But my kids know that I will always show up for them, that I will communicate to them when and if I can’t, and I will bring them along as much as I can. They know that I will always buy them a book if they want it, that we will sing with the windows down and scan the beach for sea glass.

They know I work hard. They witness it every day.

And they know that I will be at the front of the school pickup line, my arms out, eager to hear about their day. I’ll get back to the income-earning work later.

— By Whitney Popa

Whitney Popa is a writer and communications consultant in Edmonds and Emilie Given is a virtual assistant agency owner in Lynnwood. They write this column together to share work-from-home ideas. They love where they live and are grateful the virtual world allows them to achieve more work/life harmony. They also co-host a weekly podcast where they share their entrepreneurship journeys while learning about those of others. You can learn more about Emilie here and more about Whitney here.